Archive | 12:37 pm

“The Most Popular Farm in the WORLD”

3 Aug

My boys created it. This morning. Our living room. It’s super super popular. The most. In the world.

What makes such a popular farm? A few things. Firstly, one must have a “Hard To Find” section. This portion of the farm houses some of the most hard to find species (it’s certainly no misnomer). Like what? Well, how about 2 dinosaurs? Seen any of those lately? Hard to find. Also, the elusive Super Gigantic Bat lives within the walls of the HTF section. I haven’t seen one of those in captivity in YEARS. Lastly, and really, most crucially, one must must MUST have a dinosaur/SGB wrangler. Meet Michelangelo. He’s a pro. His wages are astronomical, but he’s worth every slice.


I'm glad you've got him under control, Mikey.

I’ve done an extensive interview with the creator of the next section:

The Baby Cage

According to the Baby Cage Architect there are some components necessary in creating a “safe” and “happy” place in which baby animals reside. The first of these components are “lots and lots of poles”. What do these poles do? How do they protect the young ones at such a delicate stage of life?

“The poles collect all of the electricity and energy together and gather up all of the tornadoes and lightning to keep the babies safe. It’s for distractment and destroyment.” – BCA


Also, an important entertainment component of the BC is the many television screens on which the babies “get to watch The Princess Bride EVERY DAY.” How lucky are they? I can only imagine Baby Tiger saying “No more rhyming and I mean it!” while Baby Rhino finishes with “Anybody wanna peanut?”.

Won’t this farm be amazingly popular??? You bet. Oh, wait. I forgot the most important element in popular farm formation – a pile full of really cute boys:

Pardon the absence of Architect #4. Farm creation is exhausting and a construction induced nap was a necessity.