Archive | 8:55 pm

Say Cheese! Then put it back in the fridge.

15 Oct

Today was Church Photo Directory Picture Day.   For those of you who’ve never been part of such an event, you can think of it as School Picture Day plus grown-ups and minus the free combs.

It’s been a few *cough, almost nine, cough* years since our last Photo Directory.  Our family has changed a bit since then.  For instance here’s our picture from the winter of 2003:

It’s a missing children photograph.  And get this – it’s not like we left them with a sitter or accidentally forgot them.  There were simply no children.  None.  Well . . .  see that gleam in Jerry’s eye?

Never mind.

Other notable things are missing from this picture.  For instance, I don’t see a single gray hair on either of our heads.  And look what I have instead – salon applied highlights.  Highlights!!!  Strategically placed by an actual professional!!!  I probably also had a Starbucks that morning.  Life was pretty luxurious back then.

And here’s what we looked like today:

Okay, you’re right.  There’s something missing here, too.  Besides our bodies, that is.  Thomas.  I didn’t realize his shirt had already vanished from the layout until I upload the picture.  It’s waaaaaay to late to rectify that omission, so instead, please imagine a blue oxford standing at Jerry’s right elbow.  I assure you it was there when I laid out the clothes last night and he was wearing it today.  In the pictures.  We remembered him.  Surely.

While you’re busy fantasy photoshopping my picture, could you please erase the recycling bin overflowing with milk cartons, the old fishing hat (which gladly was not worn today), the odd sock, and the corner of my breakfast bowl?  Thank you.  I appreciate your cleanliness.

Now that you’ve done such a good job virtually tidying up, wanna come over to the house?  While you’re here I’d be happy to serve you some coffee while my Nice ‘N’ Easy takes effect.